I was sitting on the tube today, on the journey over here
I was bored and playing on my phone, when I had a good idea

Get some wood and get some breeze blocks
Get some panels made of glass, put them all on top of one another in the garden
Tie this jump rope onto the swings and make a massive catapult
You get the pigs, I'll get the birds, let's play angry birds!

(Come on, that took me two days to learn! Two fucking days)

It turns out playing angry birds in real life is nowhere near
As fun as I had thought it would be, it gets rather messy
Most of them went into the neighbour's garden, some of them splattered on the house
You get the binbags, I'll get the spade, best clean up these birds

Wait a minute, where did you get those pigs from?
(Where did you get those pigs from?)
How did you make them green?
Best clean up these pigs!