Gotta Get A Fake I.D

Do you guys have fake IDs?
(crowd cheers)
Yeah, you gotta have fake ids man...
You know, i'm not gonna narc you or anything...i'm not like 21 Jump Street you
know
"C'mon, hey. You told me - in the audience - you said you had a fake id, now
talk to this officer."
You gotta have a fake id man, its the most fun cool thing that you could ever
have in college because you're a totally different person, for one night. I
mean, if you chalk it or if you get, like, one that looks nothing like you its
more fun. And you can never ask your friends if its cool because they just
want to drink, so they'll just tell you its cool like
"Let me see that, i'll tell you if its cool. Oh yeah, you got a good one, you
got a GOOD one, you got a good one. Yeah, this'll work. This is gonna work.
Uh huh, yeah, this one's gonna work. Just trust me, wear the turban. Put on
the turban, it'll work, trust me. Don't be a pussy, its really good..."