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    The hiballs were hittin me
    like King Crochea in the ninth round
    Pulled out my glass eye
    in front of the MacGuire sisters
    backstage at the Sands
    Those girls screamed bloody hell
    when I put it down next to her hand man!
    I was on my way from las vegas
    to la With a headfull of dreams,
    vermouth and big plans I know
    i haven't been spending quality time
    with the rabbi, now have i?
    But i gotta give love to the cat upstairs
    Passing by the temple bethamuna
    i raise my glass from the back seat
    of the limousine in cheers
    I spent a small fortune which seemed
    more important on dames,
    cocktails and leisure wear
    I'm a shy guy no lie,
    an apple pie guy my my.
    I'd like to kiss those lips a thousand times.
    I've been in more hotels than the holy bible
    Living on champagne and brie and grackers for survival
    Out twice a night rockin the mic to earn my heavyweight title
    Out to get as high as the Eifel tower
    Played weddings bat-mitzvahs and even baby showers
    Come on honey blow out the candles

    I got business to handle
    I'll be back to the club love
    I got another set in an hour

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    Out her hustling for a little something
    Keep the drinks pouring and my chevrolet running
    My honey looking stunning,
    Living extravagant Master of ceremonies,
    handing out trophies at the beauty pagent
    You'd think he slept in his tuxedo
    Only one time it was in the parking lot in Reno
    Oh Hell, I can't afford a hotel cause
    They emptied my pockets down at the casing
    Hey, I lost my shirt. But sometimes
    I walk away in a new suit In life's little crap shoot.

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