Dinner Tonight

The faded words on the brick walls
Sheets, box springs, mattresses
Betrayed the fact the field outback
Was the bed of two men Willie and Dan
Men of vision ahead of their peers
Unfortunately in between careers
Whatever the last straw, the bad break
It was not to be their last mistake
Dan had just spent his last penny
On a minute in the bush with reach-around Jenny
"Get over here claptrap"
Willie said and he flashed a smooth fat bottle of red
"Where the fuck did you get that Willie?
It's got a cork"
Dan gave his lips a lick
Went back to the bush to look for a stick
"Hold on Dan, you've got not class
You treat your liquor like you chase your ass
We may not have the crystal, or the table
But of one thing we're able
We're gonna consult the label"
"Fine, fine, fine!"
"This fine red wine is a bouquet that pleases
Serve with red meats, poultry and cheese"

It's coming to light what are you
What are you eating for dinner tonight?

Well Dan was confused over some of the words
Willie had to tell him that poultry was birds
"I heard that bestowed on by an honorary degree
On one stupid fuck from the University"
"Oh Willie how" asked Dan "do you expect me to wait?
Crack that baby and I will gladly pretend I am eating a steak"
"Listen up, I though this through
Check it out, down at the slew
The geese are all to fat to fly
They're slow and they're weak
And they're fucking huge
Me and you, all we gotta do
A rope, a rock, a four by two
When they're asleep, we creep up
We bash out the turd and we bag us a bird"

It's coming to light what are you
What are you eating for dinner tonight?

But the geese were quick and had the men miss stepping
They slipped up the bank and abandoned their weapons
Willie had a gander by the feet
Dan had the neck, it was hissing and spitting
Nipping his arms the welts raising
And so raging he whacked the head down
Repeatedly on the bike path
Until it was good and dead
Willie was flat on his back laughing
"Oh great hunter you must tired
You start the plucking and I'll get the fire"
But the goose wasn't cooking on the inside whole
They ripped off strips rolled 'em in the coals
Pushed in the cork with a felt pen top
Easy down so they didn't spill a drop
"When was the last time Dan do you know
You had a fat full belly and a good wine glow?
You tell me now which is which
Hey, the middle of the road or the middle of the ditch"
They rode the high until the bottle dripped dry
And song after song couldn't help them along
Well two men's wishing is as good as a command
So they scrounged enough for a flat of wild cat and got slammed

By morning a crowd had formed by the river bank
Willie and Dan were hauled to the drunk tank
Forced to appear in court for the killing of the goose
Clear city park bylaw abuse
Asked in turn how the two men plead
Willie claimed "We were helplessly led by our guts
It's like snapping, during a kidnapping
Well that's me anyway, Dan here's nuts"
"Hey!"
The judge was annoyed with the courtroom fool
Told Will and Dan they were reckless and cruel
"One question sir and I'll admit you're right
What are you eating for dinner tonight?
At least the geese set their sight to flight
Yah, what are you eating for dinner tonight?"

It's coming to light what are you
It's coming to light what are you
It's coming to light what are you

Well now, what are you eating for dinner tonight?