The Auctioneer

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There was a boy in Arkansas who 
wouldn't listen to his ma
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When she told him that he should go
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 to school.
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He'd sneak away in the afternoon, 
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take a little walk then pretty soon
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You'd find him at the local auction
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 barn.
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Well he'd stand and listen 
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carefully then pretty soon he began 
to see
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How the auctioneer could talk so 
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rapidly.
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He said, "Oh my, it's do or die 
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I've got to learn that auction cry
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Gotta make my mark and be an 
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auctioneer"


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25 dollar bidder, now 30 dollar, 30
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 will he give me 30
Make it 30, bid it up on a 30 
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dollar, will he give me 30
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Who will bid it at a 30 dollar bid?
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30 dollar bidder, now 35, will he 
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give me 35

To make it a 35, a bid at a 35,
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Who will bid it at a 35 dollar bid?


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As time went on he did his best and
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 all could see he didn't jest,
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He practiced callin' bids both 
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night and day.
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His pappa would find him behind the 
barn,
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Just a workin up an awful storm,
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As he tried to imitate the 
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auctioneer.
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Then his pappa said, "Son we just 
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can't stand to have a mediocre man,
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Selling things at auction usin' our
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 good name.
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I'll send you off to auction school
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 then you'll be nobody's fool
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You can take your place among the 
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best"


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35 dollar bidder, now 40 dollar, 40
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 will he give me 40
Make it 40, bid it up on a 40 
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dollar, will he give me 40
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Who will bid it at a 40 dollar bid?
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40 dollar bidder, now 45, will he 
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give me 45

To make it a 45, a bid at a 45,
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Who will bid it at a 45 dollar bid?


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So from that boy who went to school,
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There grew a man who played it cool,
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He came back home a full fledged 
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auctioneer.
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And people came from miles around,
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Just to hear him make that rhythmic 
sound,
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That filled their hearts with such 
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a happy cheer.
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His fame spread out from shore to 
shore,
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He had all he could do and more,
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He had to buy a plane to get around.
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Now he's the tops in all the land,
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Let's pause and give that man a 
hand,
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He's the best hillbilly auctioneer.


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45 dollar bidder, now 50 dollar, 50
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 will he give me 50
Make it 50, bid it up on a 50 
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dollar, will he give me 50
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Who will bid it at a 50 dollar bid?
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50 dollar bidder, now 55, will he 
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give me 55

To make it a 55, a bid at a 55,
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I sold that hog for a 50 dollar bid.