Alien

Feeling like I gotta go now
Time is passing me I need to slow down
If there's one thing I know I'm supposed to be different
And I know that I'm distant

I don't understand it
I'm usually drifting into an abusive existence
Why I got into this
Always been driven it's all that I know and the reason

I'm gifted with painting these pictures
They claim as magnificent
Why can't I see it? I feel like I'm missing it
Search for the infinite
What the fuck does that mean?

Heaven or hell, fade into nothing
Or are we just stuck in a world in between
We just wait for our time to be called to the test
Reflect til' the day that we're laid down to rest
Tell me why do we have to lose someone we love just to find out
That we were too scared to connect

Sometimes I'm feeling like an alien
Most days I really just can't fit in
And I always been dealing with abandonment
Truth is I don't know if I can handle this
With anxiety the only way to manage it
Is meditating with a couple dozen candles lit
Behind stage I can feel my body panicking
Staring blank out at the crowd like a mannequin

Would you miss me?
And if I was to leave would you give me a standing ovation?
And would you be proud of the music I made and the thousands of lives
That I'm saving?

And will I go down as a person
Who somehow impacted a whole generation
I wish that I knew
I guess I'll just patiently wait til' the day that I'm taken
I think I'm an alien

Feeling like I gotta go now, go now
Time is passing me I need to slow down, slow down
And I think I might of come from outer space
I'm different than the people in this place

Maybe I'm an alien
I feel just like an alien
Sometimes I'm feeling like an alien
Do you think I'm an alien
Maybe I'm an alien
Sometimes I'm feeling like an alien

Moving forward then before I know it
I'm back in my room feeling paranoia
Thinking back wondering if I was ever different
Always letting people in that were barely loyal
Put my walls down, then I get myself in a bind

Left in the dust, tell me am I crossing your mind?
I wonder if they listen every time that I rhyme
Or if my name just faded through the waves of time
I say I'm fine, but I don't even know what that means
The grass on the other side is not what it seems

They're manipulating you with all their internet schemes
Just to convince you to buy fancier things
Fell victim to the lust, didn't know how to flee
And the Illuminati is probably as real as we think

Their making money off of people getting sick in their sleep
I can no longer pretend I'ma finally speak
I'm digging deeper in the industry every persons' a diva
They wanna get something from me and cut me down as a leader

I prefer to be alone, but I still want someone to be there
Cause half of my team is missing they left me in this arena
Like damn
Fans showing me more respect than my friends do
I been losing a little more than I planned to
This is the life that I've chosen now
With an army following gotta hold it down

Would you miss me?
And if I was to leave would you give me a standing ovation?
And would you be proud of the music I made and the thousands of lives
That I'm saving?

And will I go down as a person
Who somehow impacted a whole generation
I wish that I knew
I guess I'll just patiently wait til' the day that I'm taken
I think I'm an alien

Feeling like I gotta go now, go now
Time is passing me I need to slow down, slow down
And I think I might of come from outer space
I'm different than the people in this place

Maybe I'm an alien
I feel just like an alien
Sometimes I'm feeling like an alien
Do you think I'm an alien?
Maybe I'm an alien

I'm feeling like an alien
Maybe I'm an alien
I feel just like an alien
Do you think I'm an alien?
Maybe I'm an alien
Sometimes I'm feeling like an alien