All In Vain

I gave my life up to the one who's in heaven
Never thought that it would change me so much
I was ready to bust
I had a knife against my wrist, I was ready to cut
But I guess something inside me wasn't ready enough
I ran to the church to escape from it all
He walked around me seven times and brought down all my walls
Made me realize the living I'm doing was all alone
He gave me shelter and advice, then He said welcome home
It began, I started as a sheep in the wolves
But I had fire up inside me so I reached for the tools
A couple beats and a pen, what could stop me now
I didn't know the devil was about to strike me down
Released my first disk "broken chains" and feld
So on a daily I was selling so their spirits were fed
But I was losing all the touch, fell in lust and sex
I was falling, reaching out, tell me what will happen next
Never give up, Steven you better get up
Even when stuck in a rut, breathe in and take up your cup
No matter your luck, beat in the door with a rush
Read into God and erupt, and you will see what is up
So I'm stuck between the pulling of both
Committing sin and still relying on the vision of hope
How do I cope with the struggle of a powerful force
I know the stakes, but seem to think about it when it's really too late
So I started skipping church and I started getting greedy
I'll be honest with ya', being a christian just isn't easy
But it's something I am needing, yes it's something I can have
I just gotta get my life in order, reach and get a grasp
It's the meaning of our life, so get ready for your trip
Know not everybody's perfect and a lot of times you'll slip
But you gotta keep your faith, take a lesson from a man
Who watched eternal life start slipping out his hands
So I ask, God forgive me for the things I've done
I won't be pressured by the pain though the rain will come
I'll keep your name a holy grace, and the head of my life
I won't let it be in vain, I'm a end it with a fight
Right beside you, let me be the one that you took
Give me a chance to prove that I am more than a hook
More than a song or a verse, there's a person in the midst
Let me fix what I've missed, if I slip, quick this is it
No longer falling, wanna walk with the Son
So keep my eyes on every demon and keep breath in my lungs
I feel eternal but I'm mortal, 'till I'm taken away
I won't end up like the others, I can't handle the pain
I was shown the bitter death of myself
And if I didn't take a stand and fight forever, I'd be crying for help
No longer striving to sell, no longer trying to tell
But since the devil's working steady tryin' to drive me to hell
You better take me to the gates, I feel ready to blow
But I know that I got work to finish before I go
Unload it through the music and disciple on the beat
And try to get the people saved that be thuggin' in the streets
Defeat will never touch me, I gotta succeed
And keep a stable seat with Christ, I'm down on my knees
Showing my love for him, thank you for the mercy you gave
'cause if you didn't, on the real, I'd no longer be saved
I love you