Gotta Be Alone

I remember thinking as I laid upon the floor
all of the lights off and listening to Sharp
I was afraid
but I'm not sure what of
and I would shut my eyes and turn on the tv
to people speaking in a language I can't speak
and I would say, how I would say
that I was being healthy
but no, I was far from healthy
and nobody saw me at all
but sometimes you just gotta be alone
and if you can't be happy on your own
then how will you ever be happy with somebody else
think I was dancing when she walked into the room
next thing I know, we're sharing a cab home
I made her laugh
but I should've left it alone
cause cut to two weeks later and I'm picking at a scab
when at a party her friend tells me "don't be mad"
'twas a mistake, a small mistake
and I was aware of that
but no, it don't hurt that bad
it's only a scratch
I'm not a train wreck for you
well she was falling down the stairs, drunk and pathetic
it was so hard not to laugh, I won't ever forget
I was sitting on the floor, dressed up as batman
flicking people off and making fun of their accents
concluding to myself that I would always be alone
but it was premature, I was only nineteen years old