A Longing For The Still

Mayfield

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    This isn't the place where I thought I would be
    Caught in the chase and forgot how to breathe
    A blink and a laugh, it's now all but a memory
    I'm not the man who I swore I would be
    Who lived everyday like the last one he'd see
    But I'm not a liar, the truth is a thief

    If you asked how I saw myself - where I’d be
    Losing hope and lost at 23
    Honestly, this is reality catching up with me
    I can’t find ways to harness time
    Everyday, falling further back to yesterday
    Absent minded of all that I have
    I can’t get it back

    My childhood: A past life
    An alternate universe
    Days slipping away, like sand through my fingertips
    Like sand, slipping away

    The only way I can make this last is to push myself until there’s nothing left
    Make a mark on my fucking life
    This is the last chance standing in a world of lies
    I bleed myself dry
    Draining the love I’ve got, until my face goes white and my heart just rots

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    Until my heart fucking rots

    So if you asked how I saw myself living out every single fucking day in hell
    I know that I’ve been here too long
    It's time to get out right now

    I need to get out now

    The world is waiting, and I can’t wallow in my self-deception, Swallowing me whole

    Let it all sink in
    We spend too much time living inside our minds
    We waste in time as a vessel for the soul and live as apparitions. We live to conquer
    We live to embrace the human connection
    And we live to face annihilation
    Watch the wind carry on
    Feel time slip through your fingertips
    Stretch your limbs high and breathe deep as your body seeps into the soil
    Greet the light with all the respect it deserves

    This isn’t the place where I thought I would be
    Caught in the chase and forgot how to breathe
    A blink and a laugh, it's now all but a memory
    I’m still not the man who I swore I would be
    But with each passing day, the clearer I see
    I know the truth and that’s all that I need

    Don’t hold back your dreams for fear of failure
    The only anchor you’ll set is your own
    Learn to let go

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