Don't Open That Mayonnaise

Misfats

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    I bought this jar of condiments so long ago
    And now when I wanna use it, I really do not know
    Just when did I buy it? When was it made?
    A thought comes to me as I twist the lid:

    Don't open that mayonnaise
    Expiration reads this past May
    Don't open that mayonnaise
    You might not like what you'll find
    Inside

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    Don't open that mayonnaise
    Expiration reads this past May
    Don't open that mayonnaise
    You might not like what you'll find
    Inside

    Made of dairy products oh so long ago
    Now induces stomach cramping and painful fecal flow
    Entering a realm of a pain I've never known
    Bowing to the god, the god of porcelain

    Don't open that mayonnaise
    Expiration reads this past May
    Don't open that mayonnaise
    You might not like what you'll find
    Inside

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