The Cheques In The Post

C

[Verse 1}
Am7                  F
Me and my lawyer sat down and worked out
         C      C/B  Ab            A7
The full cost of the wrongs I have done you
F                            G
And I'm sending the money to you
                    C           E
The cheque's in the post
Am7            G
For giving you hell
       Am7                           G
When I should have been treating you well
     Dm     Em7                                Am7
Reparation: five hundred five pound notes in a roll

[Bridge 1]
    C/G                G
For remarks about your weight
    C/G                       G
For complaining when you were late
       Dm     Em7                            Am
Compensation: two thousand pounds, the going rate
        C/G           G
For the times we were out
       C/G             G
And my eye kept roving about
                    Dm             Em7
Settling on younger women: Fifteen hundred, say it's
Am7
Forgiven

[Chorus 1]
C/G            E                       F
Running total: six thousand three hundred and fifty
G#
Pounds
               C
With tax added on
    G                            C     E7
And that's just the end of verse one

    Am7            G
For attacking your superstition
     Am7                 G
Your pantheistic new age religion
Continues after the ad
              Dm                        Em
Let's say the sum of one thousand seven hundred and
       Am7
Ninety seven

[Bridge 2]
        C/G                             G
When I said your new dress wasn't splendid
        C/G                           G
When I told you the way the film ended
              Dm                  Em7
I guess I was wrong, accept this token: seven thousand
    Am7
Pounds
        C/G                      G
And for passing the pictures I'd taken
   C/G               G
Of your body totally naked
               Dm                       Em7
Around all our friends, let's call it a round nine
         Am A7
Thousand pounds

[Chorus 2]
C/G            E                        F
Running total: twenty four thousand one hundred and
            G#
Forty seven pounds
               C
On it's way to you
    G                             Am7 A7
And this is just the end of verse two

[Verse 2]
Am7                  F
Me and my lawyer sat down and worked out
         C           Ab            A7
The real cost of the wrongs I have done you
F                            G
And I'm sending the money to you
                    C           E7
The cheque's in the post
Am7                 G
And for my next indiscretion
            Am7                         G
When we had sex on the floor of the kitchen
               Dm               Em7
I sang it in a song: accept ten thousand - make that
                  Am7 A7
Eleven thousand - pounds

[Bridge 3]
        C/G                    G
And for failing to give enough time
       C/G                       G
To the baby that could have been mine
                      Dm             Em7
It's not that I don't care, my love, it's just so hard
          Am7 A7
To find a figure

[Chorus 3]
C/G                    E
Worst of all I stopped loving your body
F                  G#
Making you feel so low
          C              E
Though my lawyer says no blame can be apportioned
    F                       G#
For circumstances beyond my control
           C
So now I'm all paid up
        E
And absolved from this guilt
             F
I'm going to get another girl in
         G#
Under my quilt
        C
And run up
Ab              A7
Another massive debt

[Other]
     F
Hail Mary
            Em
Pray for me now
                          Am
Now and at the hour of my death.

Am
(Ba-ba-da ba-ba-da ba-ba-da)
Am
(Ba-ba-da ba-ba-da ba-ba-da)