Joxer Goes To Stuttgart

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Diddly aye stuff

[Verse]
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It was in the year of '88 in the 
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lovely month of June
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When the gadflies were swarming and 
dogs howling at the moon
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With rosary beads and sandwiches 
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for Stuttgart we began
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Joxer packed his German phrasebook
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 and jumpleads for the van

Some of the lads had never been away
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 from home before
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'Twas the first time Whacker put 
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his foot outside of Inchicore
Before we left for Europe we knew 
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we'd need a plan
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So we all agreed that Joxer was the
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 man to drive the van

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In Germany the autobahn, 'twas like 
the Long Mile Road
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There was every make of car and van 
all carrying the full load
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Ford Transits and Hiaces and a 
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Bedford from Tralee
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With the engine overheating from 
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longhauling duty free

There was fans from Ballyfermot, 
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Ballybough and Ballymun
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On the journey of a lifetime, and 
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the craic was ninety-one
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Joxer met a German's daughter on the
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 banks of the river Rhine
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And he told her she'd be welcome in
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 Ballyfermot any time

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And as soon as we found Stuttgart,
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 we got the wagons in a ring
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Sean óg got out the banjo and Peter 
played the mandolin.
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Oh there were fans there from 
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everywhere, attracted by the sound
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At the first Fleadh Ceol in Europe
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 and Joxer passed the flagon round

But the session it ended when we’d 
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finished all the stout
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The air mattresses inflated and 
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the sleeping bags rolled out
As one by one we fell asleep, Joxer 
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had a dream
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He dreamt himself and Jack Charlton
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 sat down to pick the team

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Joxer dreamt they both agreed on 
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Packie Bonner straight away
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And that Moran, Whelan and McGrath 
were certainly to play
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Ah but tempers they began to rise,
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 patience wearing thin
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Jack wanted Cascarino, but Joxer 
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wanted Quinn

And the dream turned into a 
nightmare, Joxer stuck the head on 
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Jack
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Who wanted to bring Johnny Giles 
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and Eamonn Dunphy back
Ah well the cock crew in the 
morning, it crew both loud and 
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shrill
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And Joxer woke up in his sleeping 
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bag many miles from Arbour Hill

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Next morning none of the experts, 
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gave us the slightest chance
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They said the English team would 
lead us on a merry dance
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With their Union Jacks all them 
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English fans for victory they were 
set
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Until Ray Houghton got the ball 
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and he stuck it in the net

What happened next is history, 
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brought tears to many eyes
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That day will be the highlight of 
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many people's lives
Joxer climbed right over the top and
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 the last time he was seen
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arm in arm with Jack Charlton 
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singing, Revenge for Skibereen

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Now Whacker's back in Inchicore, 
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he's living with his mam
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And Jack Charlton has been 
proclaimed an honorary Irishman
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Do you remember that German's 
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daughter on the banks of the river 
Rhine
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Well, didn't she show up in 
Ballyfermot last week and ...