Ravens

Bm

[Verse 1]
Bm
In October 2015, I was out in the yard

I'd just finished splitting up the scrap two-by-fours into kindling
Em
I glanced up at the half moon, pink, chill refinery cloud light

Two big blackbirds flew over, their wings whooshing and low
A
Two ravens, but only two
       F#m     G       F#m           G     Bm
Their black feathers tinted in the sunset

[Verse 2]
Bm
I knew these birds were omens but of what I wasn't sure

They were flying out toward the island where we hoped to move
Em
You were probably inside, you were probably aching, wanting not to die

Your body transformed
                                        A
I couldn't bear to look so I turned my head west

Like an early death
F#m             G              F#m                  G
Now I can only see you on the fridge in lifeless pictures

[Verse 3]
Bm
And in every dream I have at night, and in every room I walk into

Like here, where I sit the next October, still seeing your eyes
Em
Pleading and afraid, full of love
                                               A
Calling out from another place because you're not here

I watched you die in this room, then I gave your clothes away
             F#m G
I'm sorry, I had to
    F#m       G    Bm
And now I'll move

[Verse 4]
Bm
I will move with our daughter, we will ride over water
Em
With your ghost underneath the boat

What was you is now burnt bones, and I cannot be at home
A
I'm running, grief flailing

F#m G F#m G

Bm

[Verse 5]
Bm
The second time I went to Haida Gwaii was just me and our daughter
Em
Only one month after you died, my face was still contorted

Driving up and down, boots wet inside, aimless and weeping
    A
I needed to return to the place where we discovered that
F#m    G   F#m                 G             Bm
Childless, we could blanket ourselves in the moss there, for our long lives

But when we came home you were pregnant
                                    Em
And then our life together was not long

You had cancer and you were killed, and I'm left living like this

Crying on the logging roads with your ashes in a jar
          A
Thinking about the things I'll tell you
                                            F#m    G
When you get back from wherever it is that you've gone
F#m                G               Bm
     But then I remember death is real

[Verse 6]
Bm
And I'm still here in Masset, it's August 12th, 2016
                                          Em
You've been dead for one month and three days

And we are sleeping in the forest

There is sand still in the blankets from the beach

Where we released you from the jar
         A
When we wake up, all the clothes that we left out are cold and damp
              F#m     G
Just from the air permeating
      F#m         G
The ground opens up

[Verse 7]
Bm
Surrounded by growth, nurse logs with layers of moss and life

Young cedars, the sound of water, thick salal
    Em
And God-like huckleberries

The ground absorbs and remakes whatever falls

Nothing dies here
     A
But here is where I came to grieve

To dive into it with you
F#m          G
With your absence
   F#m                    G
But I keep picking you berries