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    Arnie works the cyclone at the state fair
    Says he's in it for the chicks
    Smokes about two packs of cigarettes each day
    And he drinks just like a fish
    Arnie never talks of family
    And he never found a wife
    He sleeps with the bearded lady
    So does the guy that swallows knives

    Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him
    Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him
    Oh and I, I'm quite a lot like him-I swear

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    Arnie talks as if someday he'll leave
    If the right thing comes along
    A distant dream as a mercenary marine
    Is a dream that's long gone

    My eyes, my eyes they're not like his
    Maybe a little
    God, I wish my eyes were just like his

    Arnie's on the road eight months each year
    Winters down south where it's warm
    He's in a trailer park in Sarasota
    Getting drunk with the clowns

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