Am                           D G
Yo Ninja Brian, you see that high schooler over there getting pushed around? 
Am                     D G
This looks like a job for the Cool Patrol!


[Verse 1]
     Am                       D G
Hey Kid! (Yo!) You're getting picked on in school
         Am                       D G
The other boys! (Huh!)! They say you just ain't cool
            Am                       D G
Well that's bullshit! (Yeah!!) We're gonna teach you the rules
 E
Those motherfuckers ain't gonna bother you no more

     Am                       D G
We are the bad boys (Oh!) from the tough side of town 
    Am                       D G
We are the Cool Patrol (Woo!) we'll turn your life around
    Am                       D G
Those bullies (AW SHIT) their ass is done for now
           E
We're gonna show you how! So fuckin' listen y'all! First…


[Chorus]
             G
You put your hands in the air 
        D
And you jump off the ground
              Am                          C 
And then you take that funky butt and you shake it all around
            G                              D
And lightly jog in place and then crank it up to a prance
            Em             C
This is the cool patrol dance


[Verse 2]
             G
Now put your hands in your pockets
              D
And take them right back out
          Am                             C
Then spin around in a circle and make an animal sound (moo)
           G                                    D              
Then glide into the sprinkler like you're gonna water the plants
            Em               C
This is the cool patrol dance 
Am Em F G 
      Whee!


[Bridge]

Am D G x2


[Verse 2]
    Am                       D G
Motherfuckin' bullies better watch their ass
    Am                       D G
You're sending all them shits a message there's a new king in class
    Am                       D G
When they see you they're gonna freak out and piss their pants
      E
THEY AD  YOUR BITCHES! THEY AD  YOUR BITCHES BECAUSE...


[Chorus]
             G
You put your hands in the air
               D
And then stick out your rear end
             Am                          C
And then you wiggle it real hard and you hug your closest friend
             G                  D
And then you wildly remove your clothes and tearaway pants
            Em               C
This is the cool patrol dance


[Verse 3]
            G
Now rub the peanut butter on you
          D
From your head to your feet
          Am                            C
And cover up your nudity with different cheeses and meats
            G                                D
Then slap a camel because this could be your only chance
           Em                 C
This is the cool patrol dance


[Bridge]
     G        D      Am   C
Cool Break!

G  D Am   C x3


[Chorus]
             G
You put your hands in the air
           D
And grab a bird from the sky
           Am                    C
And eat it whole so that you may absorb its power of flight
             G                               D
Now you can also dive bomb fish because your vision's enhanced
            Em               C
This is the cool patrol dance


[Verse 4]
           G
You're basically a superhero now
        D
So throw some cars
         Am                             C
Then rub your magnum thighs together and set fire to Mars
    G                           D
Now harness all your sexy fury in a victory stance
            Em                C
This is the cool patrol dance!

Am         Em                F           G         Am
       Your training is complete! Now go show those fuckers who's boss!