Cherry Tree Lane Part 1

[MRS BRILL]
Katie Nana! Who gets stuck with the children with no nanny in the house? Me, that's who!

[KATIE NANA]
I've said my say, Mrs Brill, and that's all I'll say. I've done with this house forever!

[MRS BRILL]
Well, good riddance, then.

[WINIFRED]
Katie Nana!
Gone? Are you quite sure

[MRS BRILL]
Gone! And is it any wonder?

[WINIFRED]
Choosing the right nanny I keep drawing blanks
Do you really think I made another blunder
What on earth am I to say to Mr Banks?

George, dear
I'm feeling so bereft, dear
Another nanny's left, dear
Every nanny goes
We're unlucky, I suppose

[WINIFRED, MRS BRILL, JANE, MICHAEL & ROBERTSON AY]
We are never going to find the perfect nanny

[GEORGE]
Nonsense!

Precision and order
That's all that I ask
The running of a household
A straightforward task
The children, the servants
They're all your domain
Whilst I remain the sovereign
Of Cherry Tree Lane
Coat!

[MRS BRILL]
Coming, sir.

[GEORGE]
The simple truth is you've engaged six nannies over the last four months and they've all been unqualified disasters.

A nanny should govern
A nanny should rule
A nanny is a paragon
Who suffers no fool
A nanny's a stalwart
Our children would gain
By having such a nanny
In Cherry Tree Lane

[WINIFRED]
Of course, George but--

[GEORGE]
So take control of situations
Show your authority
When interviewing staff
You know your role
They know their stations
Efficiency and forethought
Cut the jobs in half
Briefcase.

[WINIFRED]
I thought Katie Nana would be firm with the children. She always looked so cross.

[GEORGE]
Winifred, never confuse efficiency with a liver complaint.

[WINIFRED]
Clear thinking, sound judgement

[GEORGE]
That's how to advance

[GEORGE & WINIFRED]
Then things will run like clockwork

[GEORGE]
Leave nothing to chance
When nannies go missing
The answer is plain
Our children must be monsters

[WINIFRED]
Oh how can they be monsters?

[GEORGE & WINIFRED]
In Cherry Tree Lane

[GEORGE]
Umbrella.

[WINIFRED]
Oh, if only we could find someone like your old nanny.

[GEORGE]
I'm afraid that's not realistic, my dear. Few women alive could manage Miss Andrew's standards of efficiency. Besides, we could never afford someone of her calibre.

[MRS BRILL & ROBERTSON AY]
Precision and order
He wants nothing less

[ROBERTSON AY]
It's like an army barracks

[MRS BRILL]
Yes, and we're in a mess

[MRS BRILL & ROBERTSON AY]
No wonder the nannies are driven insane
We're living in a madhouse
In Cherry Tree Lane

[GEORGE]
Now, place an advertisment in the Times stating that Jane and Michael Banks require the best possible nanny… At the lowest possible wage.

[JANE]
Father, we've written our own advertisment.

[GEORGE]
What?

[WINIFRED]
Oh please, George, I think we should hear it.

[JANE]
Wanted. A nanny for two adorable children.

[GEORGE]
Adorable? Well, that's debatable, I must say.