Jazz Fever

Rachel Bloom

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    11pm, my typical day
    Cab ride to a club to hear some sweet jazz music play
    Pick out a musician, buy him a gin
    Then I take him home for a delicious night of sin

    Now I got a sore
    Down in my drawers
    I'm nauseous and I'm feeling kinda hot
    Woo!
    A sore throat that lingers
    And rashes on my fingers
    My mother once warned me of this illness I got

    I got jazz fever
    It's the fever that you get from too much jazz
    Jazz fever
    It's the fever that you get from too much jazz

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    I go to the doctor, say how bad I feel
    He looks me up and down and says
    Jazz fever isn't real, you have syphilis
    Oh, guess they don't teach jazz in medical school
    He tells me: Take this medicine
    But I ain't a fool, instead I take

    More ja-ya-ya-ya-yazz
    The only cure for jazz fever is more jazz
    (Charleston!)
    Jazz fever
    Buzz off, penicillin
    Inject me with jazz

    Now I gone deaf
    (From the trumpets!)
    I can't feel my feet
    (From the dancing!)
    I'm having seizures and my back skin looks like raw meat
    (Can't explain that!)
    The doctor keeps calling
    But I've sealed my fate
    'Cos jazz has an 80% mortality rate

    Jazz fever
    (Cough)
    It's the fever that you get from too much jazz
    (Charleston)
    Jazz fever
    It's the fever that you get from too much jazz

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