Quarantined

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[Verse 1]
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Wash my hands,  I don't touch my face,  I stay at home,  Shelter in place,
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Social distance,  Don't go to work,    I wear a mask, & gloves,  & stay away from church.

[Verse 2]
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I avoid old folks,  And should I sneeze,  I do it in my elbow,  Or up my sleeve,
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Six feet apart,  That is the rule,    And I pray for the day, the kids can go back to 
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school.

[Chorus 1]
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I'm washing my hands,  Like a racoon with OCD,
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I've watched Hulu, Roku, Netflix,  PBS and the BBC,
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I've taken down all my mirrors,  And I'm,  Sick of what I see . . .
Continues after the ad
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Two more weeks of quarantine will be the death of me.   (The death of me . . . )

[Verse 3]
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I risk a trip,  To the grocery store,  To buy T.P.  And a few things more,
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But when I get there,  All I can find,     Is sixteen Honey Buns and some Mad Dog wine.

[Chorus 2]
      G                        D
I'm washing my hands,  Like a racoon with OCD,
              A7                      D          D7
I've watched Hulu, Roku, Netflix,   PBS and the BBC,
       G                                    D              G
I've taken down all my mirrors, 'Cause I'm sick of what I see . . .
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Yeah two more weeks of this quarantine is gonna be the death of me.   (The death of me . . . )

[Other]
'spoken'
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You know they say this is war, No we don't have to storm Omaha Beach or Porkchop Hill,
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Ha, We just lay here on the couch, and watch T.V.
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“Whew, I'd rather volunteer for a high risk comando raid to parachute into Wuhan and find
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that little fellow that ordered that bat soup.
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I know what I'm talking about in my head, Saying crazy stuff over and over like, “Yes Dear, Yes 
Dear.”
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At breakfast I meant to say “Honey please pass me the pepper” but what slipped out was
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“You Crazy Woman You've Ruined My Life.”  Hehe.
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Of course I immediately appologised,  Ha,   As soon as I regained consiousness.