Laura

She meets you at the door
She greets you back from war
She reads out loud
She feeds them kraut
She leads the local scouts

Her breed is fading out
They flee the town about
Her sheets are tight
Her deeds a sight
Her creed a candle bright

Oh Laura's neat
She's oh so sweet
She'd never miss a beat
But Laura's bleak
Immensely meek
She turns the other cheek

Oh Laura's chic
Elle a l'air Belgique
Her lips c'est magnifique
But Laura's weak
Plays hide and seek
And never climbs her peak

So where was Pete last night?
His tweed's not looking right
He loves Lou Reed
He spreads his seed
He trades in trick or treat

Oh Laura's neat
She's oh so sweet
She'd never miss a beat
But Laura's bleak
Immensely meek
She turns the other cheek

Oh Laura's chic
Elle a l'air Belgique
Her lips c'est magnifique
But Laura's weak
Plays hide and seek
And never climbs her peak

Get on you feet
Don't overheat
You won't defeat her in your sleep
Make him mincemeat
Draw juice of beet
Your seat is not that cheap
You'll meet and greet
Miss Wonder White Wheat
Delete the pleat retreat
Now get on you feet
Get on your feet