Unknowable

This is a story that came from the void
From the infinite emptiness
No sound, no feelings, no dreams, no regrets
Just an infinite looped thought, staring at an immense black blank canvas
The memories, oh, the memories I used to have, worn-out
Vanished in this path of solitude
No memories persisted
Not even to mourn
The places I used to know got lost in time and remained light-years away
An unforgiving time with a million days per year
Short days, short as nights
A huge contrast, light-shadow, airy-damped, sickly aligned in a nauseating spinning motion that creates an uncomfortable cold war in my nucleus
I’m tired of being half light and half shadow
Constantly changing, like an empty libra in the wind
Wobbling
With the wind
This loop is endless
I have no summer, not even spring
This cold penetrates my bones, my body shrivels
Upon me, no yellow leaves shall fall
There is no air to breathe
Here, trees were forbidden to root on my chest
I have only frozen seeds hoping for the right soil
Connectors of life, sleeping in a dark cold chamber
I am stuck in this momentum
I am stuck in this momentum
Stuck in this momentum
Walking in a direction I can not choose
My mass gets colder and drier year by year
And this giant mess is the only thing that is still with me
Tamely with me, in this unlimited space
How can it be possible to be an unknown to myself?
To feel that there’s no decision you can make
No change you can even desire
No ambition
Nothing
I wish I could escape, I wish I could feel attracted
I wish I could feel, I wish
If you could hear me, pull me out of this vicious circle
Release me
Let me fall
Please
Let me fall