Emergency

       D                           
If the television licence man comes
                   Am        G
 at a quarter to three
        D                          
and the fictionalized characters 
                   Am        G
are becoming a reality
        D                       
and the Channel 4 woman tries to 
                      Am        G
spring a survey on me
D
what d'you think of Diverse Reports?
                         Am G
what do you think of ITV?
            D          G
and you can stand back one to ten
    A    D     G   A            
and see, and you, and it’s 
      Em
getting to me
           D         G             
and if you walk five miles just to 
A
see
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D         G    A                 
Emergency Only and it’s getting 
  Em
to me

       D                         
If the TV detector van comes at a 
              Am       G
quarter to four
        D                          
and you try to explain you were 
                        Am   G
just on your way out the door
        D                          
and the church hall woman tries to 
                     Am      G
spring a survey on me
D
what do you think of MORI-polls?
                                Am 
what do you think of Billy Cosby?
     G

            D           G
and you can stand back one to ten
     A    D                   G  
and see, and you should know 
    A                   Em
better, and it’s getting to me
           D         G             
and if you walk five miles just to 
A
see
D         G     A               
Emergency Only, and it’s getting
    Em
 to me

F#m                       Em
Think of yourself with an old age 
pension
F#m                    Em
scares the hell out of me not to 
mention
D                   G
genocide, homicide, five-a-side, 
suicide
D                     G
matricide, pesticide, law-abide, 
woe-betide