Not Guilty

Falling, fading
Down, down, down I go
(Dancing with the devil)
Falling, fading
Down, down, down
Down I go

You really wanna know what happened?
I'll tell you how it went
I put my man down like a dog 'cause he hit like a little bitch
And I didn't deserve that shit
I just wanted my fairytale
But there's no such thing as happy endings
So I had to fuckin' bail
Just hop that ship before it went down
And soon the talk was around the town
The couple that always seemed so nice
Well, there was trouble in paradise
We were like a massive fire that blazed ten feet high
One time, he hit me so hard I almost fuckin' died
But now, I'm the one on the stand because he wasn't a real man
Just a monster made of evil, living with him became lethal
He loved to make me look crazy, backhand me then call me, baby
I knew no one was gonna come and save me
If I didn't take him, he was gonna take me
So yeah, I did it, and now I made it bloody
The man could fool you like he was Ted Bundy
I was done with every, I didn't mean it, honey!
I been stressed out just because of Mone
So yeah, I loved the sound of him crying and begging for his life
He was supposed to keep me protected
I was supposed to be his wife!

Falling, failing (according to the national coalition against domestic violence
Domestic violence is one of the most chronically under-reported crimes)
Down, down, down I go (only 25% of all physical assaults, 20% of all rapes
And 50% of all stalking perpetrated against females)
Falling, fading (are reported to the police
For the small number of cases that do get reported, on average, a woman will be assaulted)
Down, down, down (by her partner or ex-partner 35 times before reporting it to the police)
Down I (if ever)

You know what, I'm glad that he's dead
The fucker got inside my head and he nudged me to the end of a cliff and pushed me right off the edge
Then I crawled out of a vat of acid when my friends asked me what changed
He went from my abuser to my bitch, so now I keep him on a chain
But he won't be puttin' his hands on me or talkin' back again
Didn't know what I was capable of or that I could bring the pain
See, my husband liked to beat on women, so I chopped off his hands and all was forgiven
Didn't know how to keep his dick in his pants, now it stays in a jar on my night stand
Couldn't keep his mouth shut neither, so I bashed in a couple teeth
He'll think twice before he runs around or tries to beat on me
You see these shiny little tools here? Well, these are all my friends
And they're the last thing you're gonna see 'cause your life's about to end
Let me wash his blood off my hands and then we can go for our drink
Shit, I must have hit him kinda hard 'cause I found his teeth in my sink
I think I like this feeling, this power in my veins
The motherfucker had it coming, now I'll never be the same

Falling, fading (as COVID-19 crisis surged in the United States, stay at home orders were put in place, stay at home orders intended to protect the public and prevent)
Down, down, down I go (widespread infection left many IPV victims trapped with their abusers)
(Domestic violence hotlines prepared for an increase in demand)
Falling, fading (as states enforced these mandates, but many organizations experienced the opposite. In some regions, the number of calls dropped by more than 50%)
Down, down, down (experts in the field knew that rates of IPV had not decreased, but rather the victims)
Down I go (were unable to safely connect with services)

I was tired of all his cat and mouse
I wanted him to clean while I sat on the couch
I wanted just one day without him drinking
I was finally finished, I was finally thinking
I'm sinking into insanity, and my pain tolerance is high
So I showed who's the fuckin' boss, I wore the pants this time
I wouldn't expect you to understand, he was the slaughter and I was the lamb
And I never had this planned, but I didn't stand a chance
So I should've done this sooner, he wasn't my husband, just my abuser
I don't need to tell you why, no offense your honor, but I don't think you'd get it

Falling, failing (domestic violence is in many ways a quiet epidemic, though in plain sight, victims are often invisible)
Down, down, down I go (fearfully denying their situation and hiding behind the facade of the happy home, but the statistics reveal a shocking reality: Every 9 seconds a woman)
Falling, fading (in America is assaulted or beaten)
According to the national coalition against domestic violence, a mind-boggling 1 in 3 women)
Down, down, down (has been a victim of physical brutality by an intimate partner
(This makes intimate partner violence)
Down I go (the single greatest cause of injury to women)