A Little Priest

Ms. Lovett:
Seems a downright shame...

Todd (spoken):
Shame?

Ms. Lovett:
Seems an awful waste...
Such a nice plump frame
Wots his name has
Had...has...
Nor he can't be traced
Business needs a lift
Debts to be erased
Think of it as thrift, as a gift
If you get my drift
Seems and awful waste

I mean... With the price of meat wot it is
When you get it, if you get it

Todd:
Ah...

Ms. Lovett:
Good you got it
Take for instance ms. Mooney and her pie shop
Business never better using only pussy cats and toast
Now a pussy's good for maybe six or seven at the most
And I'm sure they can't compare as far as taste

(Simultaneously)

Todd:
Ms. Lovett, what a charming notion
Eminently practical

Ms. Lovett:
Well it does seem a waste!

Todd:
And yet appropriate as always
Ms. Lovett, how I've lived without you all these years
I'll never know!
How delectable!
Also undetectable!

Ms. Lovett:
Think about it
Lots of other gentlemen'll soon be coming in for a shave
Won't they?
Think of
All them
Pies!

Todd:
How choice!
How rare!

For what's the sound of the world out there?

Ms. Lovett:
What mr. Todd, what mr. todd
What is that sound?

Todd:
Those crunching noises pervading the air!

Ms. Lovett:
Yes, mr. Todd, yes mr. todd
Yes all around

Todd:
It's man devouring man, my dear!

Both:
Then who are we to deny it in here?

Todd (spoken):
These are desperate times, ms. Lovett
And desperate measures are called for

Ms. Lovett:
Here we are. Hot out of the oven

Todd:
What is that?

Ms. Lovett:
Its priest
Have a little priest

Todd:
Is it really good?

Ms. Lovett:
Sir, it's too good, at least
Then again they don't commit sins of the flesh
So it's pretty fresh

Todd:
Awful lot of fat

Ms. Lovett:
Only where it sat

Todd:
Haven't you got poet or something like that?

Ms. Lovett:
No you see the trouble with poet
Is how do you know it's deceased?
Try the priest!

Lawyer's rather nice

Todd:
If it's for a price

Ms. Lovett:
Order something else, though, to follow
Since no one should swallow it twice

Todd:
Anything that's lean?

Ms. Lovett:
Well then if you're british and loyal
You might enjoy royal marine
Anyway it's clean
Though of course it tastes of wherever it's been!

Todd:
Is that squire on the fire?

Ms. Lovett:
Mercy no, sir, look closer
You'll notice its grocer!

Todd:
Looks thicker, more like vicar

Ms. Lovett:
No, it has to be grocer
It's green!

Todd:
The history of the world, my love

Ms. Lovett:
Save a lot of graves
Do a lot of relatives favors

Todd:
Is those below serving those up above!

Ms. Lovett:
Everybody shaves so there should be plenty of flavors

Todd:
How gratifying for once to know

Both:
That those above will serve those down below

Todd (spoken):
What is that?

Ms. Lovett:
It's fop
Finest in the shop
Or we have some shepherds pie peppered
With actual shepherd on top!
And I've just begun
Is the politician so oily it's served with a doily?
Have one!

Todd:
Put it on a bun
Well you never know if it's going to run!

Ms. Lovett:
Try the friar!
Fried, it's drier!

Todd:
No!
The clergy is really too coarse and too mealy!

Ms. Lovett:
Then actor!
It's compacter!

Todd:
Ah, but always arrives overdone
(Spoken) I'll come again when you have judge on the menu

Have charity towards the world, my pet!

Ms. Lovett:
Yes, yes, I know, my love

Todd:
We'll take the customers that we can get!

Ms. Lovett:
High-born and low, my love!

Todd:
We'll not discriminate great from small
No, we'll serve anyone

(Simultaneously)

Ms. Lovett:
We'll serve anyone!

Todd:
Meaning anyone!

Both:
And to anyone
At all!