I’m Not Dying To Be Here

Far away, you sit in my disgrace
And you just fake your mistakes
Break your Grade A's
Take my safe space, drown me in your shame

I fear

I want you near, this time of year
I'm not dying to be here
All along the outside, you see in
I'm not dying to be here

Here again, I'm forced to play pretend
And now I never fit in
Always missing, feeling distant
All because I won't get through (To you)

I want you near, this time of year
I'm not dying to be here
All along the outside, you see in
I'm not dying to be here

I'm not dying to be here
Are you on your way? There's something to say
Despite it all, I wish you would call
'Cause I'm dying to be here