Its Not Cricket

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A:  x02220    E:  022100
C#: x4666x

D

D
She used to a topless down at the Surrey docks,
F
With tassles on her wotsits, she did a t'riffic job,
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Of raising all the eyebrows, of every lunchtime mob.
F
She went with all the tossers, who kick about a ball,
A
They say their club's the greatest and she has kissed them all,
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At the Arndale Centre, she's up against the wall.
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I can't name names cos that's not cricket,
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I can't name names that would put me in it,
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But that's another story in the finish.

D
I saw them at the pictures, a tangled heap of love,
F
He had so many women, but only classy stuff.
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I saw him at the clinic, a pink card up his cuff
F
One holiday in Bognor, a stag night hit the town,
A
The groom was in the car park, with his trousers down,
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But that's another story that won't be going round.
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I can't name names cos that's not cricket,
  D     A    G     A          G   A  D  A
I can't name names that would put me in it.
Bb          F            E      A
But that's another story in the finish.

D F D Bb A C# Eb
F A F C# C D

D
The Deptford had a beano, to Southend for the night,
F
With forty crates of lager, to see the Southend lights,
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They got home for their breakfast, pissed out of their minds.
F
This girl gave me the minces, so I asked her for a dance,
A
And in the death I kissed, and so I took a chance,
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And when I went to touch her, she tried to break my arm.
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I can't name names cos that's not cricket,
  D     A    G     A          G   A  D  A
I can't name names that would put me in it.
Bb          F            E      A
But that's another story in the finish.

A                            D A
'Know what I mean, eh? Bob?'