Slap And Tickle

Squeeze - Slap And Tickle (Chris Difford & Glenn Tilbrook)
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[Intro]
Em
(Heavy synth sweep effects)

[Verse 1]
Em
She was frigid like a Bible when she
 met her boyfriend Michael
Em
He took her in his Zephyr they sat 
like salt and pepper
Em
Looking out across the city from 
Lover's Leap is pretty
Em
The lights they flick and flutter he
 told her how he loved her
Em
Next night he called for her, but 
Dad protected daughter
Em
And told him she was poorly, a lie 
was told there surely
Em
So Michael felt rejected, this 
wasn't quite expected
Em
He drove off to his local, where he 
felt anti-social

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[Verse 2]
Em
She cried all night at missing the 
boy she could be kissing
Em
While he was falling over he drunk 
himself back sober
Em
And went home in a taxi and crashed 
out in the back seat
Em
He slept just like a baby which he 
hadn't done just lately
Em
He saw her in the morning out with 
his sister Pauline
Em
She felt all shy and soppy, he acted
 cool and cocky
Em
He said tonight at Charlie's there's
 going to be a party
Em
I'll meet you at half seven she 
visualized the heaven

[Chorus]
       A    G           A     Em
If you ever change your mind, 
        A       G       A    Em
which you do from time to time
G                                 
Never chew a pickle with a little 
slap and tickle, you have to throw 
the stone to get the pool to ripple
Em


[Verse 3]
Em
That night they danced together it 
looked like love forever
Em
He put his hand on her leg you 
should have heard what she said
Em
He tried again much later it seemed 
to aggravate her
Em
He drove home in silence avoiding 
all violence
Em
She said let's watch the city from 
Lover's Leap is pretty
Em
I think I need the fresh air she put
 a comb through her hair
Em
Then while she turned to kiss him 
and very nearly missed him
Em
She put her hand on his leg he felt 
her tongue in his head

[Chorus]
       A    G           A     Em
If you ever change your mind, 
        A       G       A    Em
which you do from time to time
G                                 
Never chew a pickle with a little 
slap and tickle, you have to throw 
the stone to get the pool to ripple
Em


[Otro]
Em
(Synth vamp over Em till fade)