I Don't Deserve The Pleasure

If I have faded over time
If I've receded over the years
It's all for the best
Wouldn't want to stay the same
Wouldn't want what would remain
But it hurts all the same

Yet I won't allow myself to cry
I won't allow myself to relieve me my pain
No I won't allow myself to cry
I won't allow myself to relieve me my pain
I don't deserve the pleasure

We all got ways to get on by
Except the ones who don't
I may be one of those who does
But not by easing out
I'm not seventeen no more
Not so sure I ever was
I sacrified my past
Became a lesser entity
I exorcised what made me me
No regrets still I ache

But I won't allow myself to cry
I won't allow myself to relieve me my pain
No I won't allow myself to cry
I won't allow myself to relieve me my pain
I don't deserve the pleasure