Gerbil

A          G             D       C
I bought a gerbil at the petting zoo
A          G               D     
If Richard Gere can do it, I can 
C
too.
A       G             D        C
I get undressed and I start to lube
A           G             D     
I stick the gerbil in the end of
     C
 the tube.

(strum the pre-chorus)
D              A
Wondering just how he'll feel
D                             
will he like it better than his 
  A
little wheel
D                A
careful now he's right beside me
D                 A
one more inch and he's inside me
D  A  D  A      D    A  D  A
GO!!!    Gerbil go!

(1st Chorus)
D      A       D      A
Burrow harder, burrow deeper
D     A      D       A
be my little chimney sweeper
D         A    D   A
one thing I forgot about
C                N/C
how am I supposed to get you out

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(back to picking the verse)
   A      G           D    C
so now my gerbils won easy street
A             G             
it's warm and cozy and there's 
   D         C
plenty to eat
A         G      D         C
the situation is beyond my control
A            G             D    
gotta find a way to get him out 
       C
of his hole.

(sturm pre-chorus)
D                A
I tried crowbars I tried wires
D                       A
I almost hurt'em with a pair of 
pliers
D                  A
I tried cheese but he's not biting
D                  A
I wish this wasn't so exciting
D  A  D  A      D    A  D  A
Go!!!  Gerbil Go!!!

(2nd Chorus)
D      A    D      A
Jesus, I am such a sucker
D          A       D     A
Please get out you fury fuuuahhh!
D       A     D      A
I think I am getting ill
C              N/C
suddenly he's very very still

(back to picking verse)
A            G       D      C
Now it's too late my gerbil died
A             G          D    C
I guess I have committed gerbacide
A           G      D             
here's some advice it's very clear 
  C
cut
A               G       D           
              A  G D(now strum verse
 chords)
if you love your gerbil...don't 
stick him up your butt
C                       A
don't stick him up your butt
little fury gerbil in your booty 
hole
don't stick him up your booma whomma
 wam
(start babbling to the music,
kind of a scat like singing) (Ha! 
Scat...um...nevermind)
Yeah!

(end on chord A)


any major life questions
consult the manual
there is a god, there is a plan
and the spaceship is coming!
         - Maria Bamford, Comedy 
Central Presents