My Curse

Cover up what has become my curse
Building up to eternal at first
Everlasting hours of insurgent cower
Voices growing louder
Painting every white intention red

Was I ever meant to be clean
And emotionally sober

Once again I'll cover up
Feed you with this silver cup
Make it up
Over and over
And I'll wait it out
Till you see what I'm about
With or without
It's over, it's over again

Unlike some I remain in silence
I'm corrupt with internal violence
Now this heart's so worthless
Leaves me torn and mindless
While the fucked up signs
Always pointed me the other way

I was surely meant to be mean
Surely so

Has this become the story of my life?
Discarding what could have been so right
Has this become my never ending fight?
Discarding what could have been so right