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    GUARD:
    Mail call! Here ya go, Bialystock, ya got a postcard.
    MAX:
    A postcard? From where?
    GUARD:
    Brazil.
    MAX:
    Brazil? Who do I know in Brazil?
    Dear Max,
    Rio is everything you said it was and more. Ulla and I think of you
    every chance we get. In the morning, when we have breakfast on our terrace,
    many different herrings. And in the evening, when we samba together in the moonlight.
    Sorry, must run. Ulla's waiting, it's almost eleven.
    Wish you were here, Leo
    Just like Cain and Abel
    You pulled a sneak attack
    I thought that we were brothers
    Then you stabbed me in the back
    Betrayed!
    Oh boy, I'm so betrayed!
    Like Samson and Delilah
    Your love began to fade
    I'm crying in the hoosegow
    You're in Rio getting laid!
    Betrayed!
    Let's face it, I'm betrayed!
    Boy, have I been taken
    Oy, I'm so forsaken
    I should have seen what came to pass
    I should have known to watch my ass!
    I feel like Othello
    Everything is lost
    Leo is Iago
    Max is double-crossed!
    I'm so dismayed
    Did I mention I'm betrayed?
    I used to be the king
    But now I am the fool
    A captain without a ship
    A rabbi without a shul!
    Now I'm about to go to jail
    There's no one who will pay my bail
    I have no one who I can cry to
    No one I can say goodbye to
    I'm drowning! I'm drowning here! I'm going down for the last time.
    I-I-I see my whole life flashing before my eyes. I see a weathered old
    farmhouse with a white picket fence. I'm running through fields of
    alfalfa with my collie, Rex. Stop it, Rex! I see my mother standing
    on the back porch, in a worn but clean gingham gown, and I hear her
    calling out to me, "Alvin! Don't forget your chores. The wood needs
    a-cordin and the cows need a-milkin'. Alvin, Alvin..." Wait a minute!
    My name's not Alvin! That's not my life. I'm not a hillbilly.
    I grew up in the Bronx. Leo's taken everything. Even my past!
    My past's a dying ember
    But wait...now I remember
    How did it begin?
    He walked into my office
    With his cockamamie scheme
    You can make more money
    With a flop than with a hit
    "We can do it, we can do it"
    "I can't do it"
    "We can do it!"
    "I can't do it!" Goodbye Max!
    Lord, I want that money!
    I'm back, Max!
    "Come on, Leo, we can do it!"
    Step one, find the play!
    See it, swirl it, touch it, kiss it!
    Hello, Mister Liebkind
    "Guten Tag, hop clop
    "Guten Tag, hop clop"
    Adolf Elizabeth Hitler?
    "Guten Tag, hop clop
    "Guten Tag, hop clop!"
    Step two, hire the director
    "Keep it gay, keep it gay, keep it..."
    Two-three, kick, turn, turn, turn, kick, turn
    Ulla!
    Oooh wah wah woo-woo- wah-wah
    Step three, raise the money
    "Along came Bialy!"
    Intermission!
    Step four, hire all the actors
    "A wandering minstrel I,
    A think of shreds and...
    Next! The little wooden boy
    Next! That's our Hitler!
    "Opening night!"
    Good luck, good luck, good luck
    Break a leg! I broke my leg!
    "Springtime for Hitler and Germany!"
    A surprise smash!
    "Springtime for Hitler and Germany!
    It'll run for years!
    "Where did we go right?
    Where did we go right?"
    Gimme those books
    Fat, fat, fatty!
    Gimme those books
    Books, fat
    Books, fat
    Books, fat
    Books, fat!
    Lousy fruit
    Kill the actors
    You ever eat with one?!
    Then you ran to Rio
    And you're safely out of reach
    I'm behind these bars
    You're banging Ulla on the beach!
    Just like Julius Caesar
    Was betrayed by Brutus
    Who'd think an accountant
    Would turn out to be my Judas!
    I'm so dismayed
    Is this how I'm repaid?
    To be...
    Betrayed!
    BETRAYED!!

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