Cycle

Sometimes when I take a step back
And look at my life, it seems like a cycle
Repeating itself over and over
With loss and stress and hunger
And hopelessness, all building up
To a brief moment of triumph

That seems to grow briefer with every repetition
And then after that moment fades away
I realize I haven't undergone any great transformation
I'm left hopeless and disappointed in myself
For failing to live up to my own expectations
Which is where the cycle repeats
Does it just go on forever?

The light has gone and I can't move on
When I look inside
I know I have myself to blame
I see the hurt in their eyes all the same

A short revival and then the crash
And thus the cycle repeats for me at last
A brief reprisal before the end
And thus the cycle begins for me again

The taste once sweet has lost allure to me
There's a beast inside, I keep it locked up far away
But it always escapes and repays

And then the lights fall dim
And the world grows colder
Victim of a man-made misery
And with a manic grin it derives my torture
Ripping at the seams of victory

A short revival and then the crash
And thus the cycle repeats for me at last
A brief reprisal before the end
And thus the cycle begins for me again