The Sideburns Song

Em C G D

[Verse 1]
Em   C
Side burns.
G                 D
On the side of my face.
      Em   C
As my head turns,
        G                      
you can see they're in the same 
 D
place.
           Em   C
On either side. Burns.
     G          D
They can't be replaced.
     Em    C
My insides burn,
       G            D
when I think of the days

before my...

[Verse 2]
Em
My side burns.
C
Look at my sideburns,
G
but don't touch my sideburns,
D
why would you do that?
Em
My heart yearns
C              G
for my own sideburns.
                 D
My side actually burns now,

what is that?

[Verse 3]
Em
What the hell man,
C                  G
why does my side burn?
                      D
What the hell's going on?
                Em
My side burns.

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Does anybody have
     C
some aloe vera?
G                       D
If you do, bring it backstage,

I'll pay you back.

[Verse 4]
Em C
1985,
         G                D
from the womb I came out (on my 
birthday)
Em         C
The doctor said,
          G       D
"What you crying about?"
         Em           C
I said, "Is that a rhetorical 
question?
    G          D
You know why I cried.
Em       C
I have a serious lack of
G           D             Em
hair on the side... of my head.

[Verse 5]
Little baby people
C
don't have sideburns.
G
They gotta grow them
D
when they're older.
Em
But if your little baby
C
already has sideburns,
G
that's awesome!

[Verse 6]
D
Don't be concerned.
Em    C
Don't be concerned
           G
about your little bitty baby
         D
with the big big sideburns.
Em              C
You should nota be

concernd-acerned about
           G
the little itty bitty baby
         D
with the big big sideburns.
Em          C                     G
Your little baby gonna be a pimp.
                       D
Your little baby gonna be a little 
baby pimp.
Em                     C
You should probably discourage
                G
that kind of profession,
               D
Because it's illegal.

And your baby's too
Em
young to be concerned
      C
about starting a business,
    G
but that's impressive
        D
if it's got the mindset.
Em
My sideburns
C
look at my sideburns,
G
back on track talkin,
D
talkin, bout side burns!
Em
My sideburns
C
look a ma' side burns.
G
La lay la la
D
loo loo
     Em   C    G    D
Side bur, hur, hurrrrnns.