The Bear Song

Uncle Smokey

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    I've looked all over for this and finally had to do it myself.
    This song was a cult/humour favourite of the early 80's.
    All I know is 'Uncle Smokey' is suppose to hail from Saskatchewan.
    Somewhere along the way I found the name 'Larry Clark' but I've
    never been able to verify it.
    It's a simple, fun song for around the campfire with kids.
    Chorus
    Oh boy, do I love bears, you can bet your life that I do,
    there ain't nothin' anywhere like a big, black bear
    as long as he's a mile away from you!
    Well the first time I went campin'
    just a knapsack on my back
    I hiked ten miles in to the bush
    with a buddy by the name of Jack.
    And old Jack, he was an expert
    He'd been campin' for a whole lot of years
    So all we took was some fishin' gear,
    a skillet and a dozen beers.

    Well the day went great, went fishin' on the lake
    and we sure had a barrel of fun.
    About ten that night, just a little bit tight
    frying fillets in the setting sun.

    Found a patch of ground,
    and laid our sleeping bags down
    and we crawled in for the night.
    Woke up about three, staring down at me,
    was a shadow in the pale moonlight...
    (NO CHORD) (THUMP 3 TIMES)
    It was a bear!
    D
    Great big mother of a bear!
    I was up in a flash, I did the ten mile dash
    and I never, ever went back there!

    Chorus

    Well the next time I went campin'
    Took my brand new, water-proof tent
    to a campground full of people
    about the nicest place I ever went

    Had a cooler full of steaks and things
    and another one full of beer
    had plenty to eat had plenty to drink
    I could have stayed there for a year

    About two o'clock in the afternoon
    I strolled down to the lake
    I met a girl named Jan with a deep brown tan
    oh boy that was a break

    By ten that night we were snuggled up nice
    and the tent was zipped up tight
    I woke up about three, staring down at me,
    was a shadow in the pale moonlight...

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    There was a great big hole
    in my brand new tent...

    It was a bear! Great big mother of a bear!
    I was up in a flash, I did the hundred mile dash
    and I never, ever went back there!

    Chorus

    Well the last time I went campin'
    I was invited by a friend called Jake
    to a great, big, bear-proof cabin
    on a hill over looking a lake

    We dad booze and girls and a fireplace
    and music that could turn you on
    We had everything that a man could need
    except we didn't have an in-door john

    Well late that night
    my stomach didn't feel right
    and I new that I had to go

    Down the winding path
    to the little out-house
    about sixty yards or so

    Well my knees were knockin'
    but I just kept walkin'
    and I made it to the place alright

    When I finished my chore and opened the door
    There was a shadow in the pale moonlight...

    I didn't even have time to buckle my belt!

    It was a bear! Great big mother of a bear!
    Soon I was runnin' through the trees
    with my pants around my knees
    and I never, ever went back there!

    Chorus

    Chorus

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