Bleeding Thoughts

I sit trying not to disperce
I try to concentrate
My brain refused this option
But I've got to finish this game
Before my dreams catch me and drag to denial
Before I puke all of my insides away

World is spinning around like a top
My conscience is getting unstable
But I must get back on the frontline
As long as I'm able
To move my legs forward
And hold a gun in my hands
To aim it and shoot in my enemies
Wanting to blast me away

I slap myself to remember
That I am still alive
I cut my skin to control
My scattering mind
Blast waves have tattered my ears
I cannot hear screams of the wounded
My brain is on boiling point
I need reset!

I've gto to find the appropriate way to
Calm the beast inside and its will to jump away
Run away
I want to strangle my false cords
My ears are bleeding I can hear no sound
I want to catch up with my liquid thoughts
Cut my eyes out to see the only

I want to strangle my false cords
My ears are bleeding I can hear no sound
I want to catch up with my bleeding thoughts
Cut my eyes out to see the only purpose