F C Bb C
You got one friend who's a flight attendant
Dm C Bb C
You got one friend who likes speed
F C Bb C
You got one friend who always wants to smoke inside of your house
Dm C Bb F
You got one friend who secretly likes to get peed on sexually
F C Bb C
You got one friend who is oh so natural
Dm C Bb C
And got one friend we all call the retard
F C Bb C
You got one friend fighting cancer
F C Bb F
You got one friend who I bet right now is barking out in the yard
[Chorus]
C F C F
But I'm the worst friend in the world
Bb Bb
I'm the worst friend in the world
C F
When you are down
Bb F C
I'm nowhere to be found
F C Bbm F
I'm the worst friend in the world
[Verse]
F C Bb C
You got one friend who's in Iraq
Dm C Bb C
You got one friend who dresses like little bo peep
F C Bb C
You got one friend who is in prison
Dm C Bb F
You got one friend who's really really in to feet sexually
F C Bb C
You got one friend who could be a competitive eater
Dm C Bb C
You got one friend who's one of those bad movie buffs
F C Bb C
You got one friend who touched you inappropriately
Dm C Bb F
And one friend who you are pining to touch
[Chorus]
C F C F
But I'm the worst friend in the world
Bb Bb
I'm the worst friend in the world
C F
When you are down
Bb F C
I'm nowhere to be found
F C Bbm F
I'm the worst friend in the world
[Verse]
F C Bb C
You got one friend who's emic Arthur fellow
Dm C Bb C
You got one friend who's a widower
F C Bb C
You got one friend who claims to have taken a dump in the White House
Dm C Bb F
You got one friend who just gave birth to twins
F C Bb C
You got one friend who goes to the gym at least twice a day
F C Bb C
And one friend who recovered from severe burns
F C Bb C
You got one friend who rubbed his penis on tv's actual Wheel of Fortune
F C Bb F
And one friend who y'all ain't, y'all ain't even on speaking terms
