Bathtub

Take my word for it, I'm not worth it.
I ignored you all night and you don't deserve it.
Morning, bathtub, my skin soft and hot.
I was sure you were right, but you're not.
I contemplate my ruined fate.
Someone will hurt me so bad one day.
And you'll resonate or I'll apologize
Or maybe I'll make the same mistake twice.
I hide from phonecalls under the warm water.
Malice desists, no it woefully recurs.
And it plays like daytime tv shows. I confuse you.
And I tell you not to love me but I still kiss you when I want to.
And I lament, you're innocent,
But somehow the object of my discontent.
And its fucked up. I let you in
Even though I've seen what can happen.

You make a tape.
I receive it in the mail
And I force myself busy.
The diversion will prevail.
And I will swallow all my guilt with little pills and forge my chin up.
And I will only think about it in the morning, in the bathtub.