I Think I Can Beat Mike Tyson

hey...hey Leroy...Leroy yeah did you hear about that boy Mike
Tyson?
Mike...Mike Tyson he's the boy that played football from
Montreal ain't he?
no no you old coop, he a...he a boxer man yeah let me tell ya I
went to his fight a couple months ago.
I seen him hit this boy, and he hit the boy so hard his head
flew off into the eigtheenth row (laughing) they had to get his
head out of the eighteenth row

[Prince & Jeff] I was in Jeff's crib one night about eight
and we were watchin'a couple of Mike Tyson fight tapes Jeff was
like... man, you see how hard Mike's punchin'?
come on Jeff the other guy was just lungin'
left, right, left, right, another K.O. if that was me I'd a been
ok though
the very next day I gave Russell a ring with J.L. and Omar we
all called Don King
I said 'yeah, Don I got a problem
tell 'em Prince 'yeah what's up? what you sayin? you tryin' to
solve 'em?'
'forget the small talk let's get to the nitty gritty' 'me and
Mike, two months, Trump, Atlantic City'
yo, you got this you gonna bust dude up
yeah, you can be my trainer word up?
I'm rough like a freight train smooth like ice and yo Jeff,
straight up, I think I can Mike Tyson
man, you can beat him, you can beat him yo man, word up yo I put
on a couple of pounds man we can do this you can do it
Newspaper boy: extra, extra read all about it Fresh Prince
challenges Iron Mike Tyson to a fight (laughing) ah he's crazy
ain't that the boy who knocked the guy's head in the fifthteen
row?
hey Leroy, you read the paper? that boy done lost his mind
[Prince, Barber] there was press conference to see what training
I was doing
before then I had never heard reporters booing
cameras flashing I was in the middle
I didn't wanna look dumb so I exagerrated a little
I said uh I been training 2o hours a day lifting big old cars
and big bales of hay (that's what he's doin')
and I run 10,000 miles every morning thinkin' about Mike and my
moment of glory (tell 'em more)
I drink water 20 gallons a pop and I can throw a Volkswagon a
whole half block (he can do it too)
and 4 million sit ups...in a minute.... ..I ain't lying I did it
(he done it)
the general public thought I was a fool
I was gettin' dissed but I guess that was cool
well gettin' dissed is never good
but I was even gettin' dissed in my old nieghborhood
I was at the corner at the top of my block there was a couple of
people standing outside of the barber shop
it was Larwence, my barber, and Franny he yelled out hey,
Prince, you can win!
I said 'really?' and I stopped to chat
you could beat him man, if you hit him wit a bat ha ha...you
gon' get whipped but can I have your shoes when he break your
neck?
everybody was laughin' out loud I thought at least my own
Grandma would be proud
I went to her house and snuck in to surpise her I heard her on
the phone (a thousand bucks on Tyson)

[Prince, Ring Announcer] it's fight day and man am I hyped boy I
can't wait to see Mike
boy I'm hyped ready to be my thing Trump Castle Casino
in this corner...weighing in at a mere 165 pounds, the Lighting
Rodent, the Fresh Prince! (booing)
and in this corner... the heavyweight champion of the world...
Iron Mike Tyson (cheering)
I came out hustling sliding and grabbing slippin' and dippin'
hustlin' and jabbin'
for a second I looked good out there but then Mike brought to
reality my worst nightmare
one punch, that's all it took (oooh) he hit me in my ribs and my
insides shook
now how can I say this and be a little discreet let's just say
that my bowels released
I called timeout and went back to my corner
said to my coach 'ain't no way I'm goin' the hell back out
there, man you can't forget it'
my body's like a punchin' bag and Mike is gonna (hit it)
they tried to make me go meet my doom but I sucker punched my
coach and hauled to my dressing room
the next day the headline in the town 'Fresh Prince breaks camp,
Tyson wins first round'
some fool asked why I ran away I said 'a good run is better than
a bad stand anyday'
my career is over as far as fightin' but I don't know what made
me think I can beat Mike Tyson
2 old men: hey Leroy! yeah did you see the fight?
did you see the fight?
the..the..the football player?
no the boxer, come on man I was at the fight last night I paid
four hundred and seventy fo' thousand dollars for my ticket
right... ah, you weren't at no fight I seen you around here last
night ..and the boy..the boy ran out the ring you always lying I
ain't lying... you lie to your grandkids.. ..I seen it... ...you
been lying ever since you was a little kid ...Mike Tyson punched
the boy in his ribs, and his leg fell off his leg fell off and
it fell over... ...you always lying ...and it knocked the HBO
camerman's camera fell out his hand I said, god damn, I couldn't
beleive it Leroy you shoulda been there...you definetly shoulda
been there ...I was right next to you playin' checkers