Mother

I crumpled up the creeds of Man
And ran out into the rain
Where I mourned for my lost virtue
But mourned more for what remained.
I’d give my grief to God
But I’m just too proud to pray.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

I’m the busted bulb in your lighthouse,
I’m the guilt dashed on your cliff.
I read about perpetuity,
I hope it’s just a myth.
Some people talk of progress
But all I see is decay.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

I pin my hopes on the future
Like martyrs to a tree
But they haven’t yet built the religion
That can hold me.
I hear tomorrow will be better,
I heard the same thing yesterday.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

Each night I go to sleep
The way a Christian goes to lions.
God can take my body,
I’m leaving my soul to science.
I’m sure He had a plan in Man
But something’s gone agley.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

There’s a stranger in this mirror,
Or is it just stained glass?
I’ve changed my face so many times,
I wish I could change the past.
There are more epithets than cigarettes
Stubbed out in my ashtray.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

I’m a gentleman, a charlatan,
Prose from a poison pen.
I lately made a big mistake:
Told the truth and sounded fake.
My friends are all long gone,
There’s none left to betray.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

I keep my guardian angel close
But always gagged and bound.
Will someone please let me know
The way off this misery-go-round?
I long to see the spin on me
In St Peter’s dossier.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

I’m told there’ll be no jobs until somebody dies
But a salary is just another word
For “consolation prize”
So I’m plodding through Perdition
Like some latter day Dante
Mother, why did you raise me this way?

Now I’ve told you all my thoughts
But I still haven’t seen that penny.
You asked me if there were bad times.
Yeah… MANY.
I long to say I love you
But it’s such a damned cliché.
Mother, why did you raise me this way?