Red Flags

Gm7                    Gm7(9)
   The date started off so well
Eb7M/G               Gm6
Begin my night not expecting
The fright of my life
Gm7
She was perfect from what I could 
tell
Gm
How could I not see
The danger right in front of me

Gm
My favorite food is fish
(baby, that's my favorite too)
I love cartoon dogs
(baby, I love Scooby Doo)

Hey girl, what's your favorite film?
She said
The best movie of all
A masterpiece of art called

Gm
Human Centipede
Am7           D7
Human Centipede

I think that I'm gonna get murdered 
tonight
Gm
Human Centipede
Am7          D7
Not ironically

She said
The costume design was a highlight
Gm
I like it for the plot
Am7
(tell me what the plot's about)
D7
German doctor sews three people ass 
to mouth (cool)
Gm
Human Centipede
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Am7               D7
Please God save me
(I think that's a red flag
I don't want to get stabbed)

C5  D5
She said
Human Centipede is a tour de force
F5
I think: Holy shit
          Am      C    D5
I'm gonna be the main course
C5  D5
She said
I admire the narrative of character 
growth
F5
I try to get the waiter's attention
            Am  G     F
By blinking in morse code

Dm
Why are you blinking so much?
A/C#
(I've got something in my eye)
F/C
Here, let me get it out
G/B
(no thank you, I don't wanna die)
 Bb                           F/A
"Bonjour, sir was blinking at me
Is this because your date is a 
     Ab
freak? (No)
A7
Very good then, bon appétit"

Gm
   Stop hiding behind your
 F
Silly made up red flag
Gm
  To not take a chance on
     F
The best relationship you never had
Gm
  Maybe you're right and
    F/A
I'm looking for excuses
Bb
  My heart's got bruises
          C                   Gm
But I'm ready to choose this love

(You could be my world)
     F
The love of my life)
Gm
One day we'll get married
        F
And be husband and wife
       Gm
With a tasteful ceremony
       F/A
At the wedding of our dreams
Bb                       C
Only if the wedding is themed

(tell me what the theme's gonna be)

Gm               Am7           D7
Human Centipede, Human Centipede

(That way we could save on the 
catering bill)
Gm               Am7             
Human Centipede, only one mouth 
   D7
to feed

If you are the best man, you know 
the deal (pucker up)
Gm                   Am7
I can finally open myself up to love
D7
I can finally sew a mouth to a butt
Gm               Am7           D
Human Centipede, Human Centipede