C               Am           D            G
Gosh, it disturbs me to see you Gaston, Looking so down in the dumps
C                Am           D             G
Every guy here'd love to be you, Gaston! Even when taking your lumps
C                 Am            D             G
There's no man in town as admired as you, You're everyone's favorite guy
Am      G       F              D              G
Everyone's awed and inspired by you, And it's not very hard to see why
G     C                 G
No one's slick as Gaston, No one's quick as Gaston
     G              C
No one's neck's as incredibly thick as Gaston
       Am               Dm     Dm      G       C
For there's no man in town half as manly. Perfect, a pure paragon!
     Am            F
You can ask any Tom, Dick, or Stanley
       G#            G#      G#        G
And they'll tell you whose team they'd prefer to be on
G     C                    G
Who plays darts like Gaston?, Who breaks hearts like Gaston?
      G              C
Who's much more than the sum of his parts like Gaston?
   Am           D
As a specimen, yes, I'm intimidating!
G#      G       C
My, what a guy, that Gaston!
  G            E
I needed encouragement, thank you, LeFou
         G         A  A7      D
Well, there's no one as easy to bolster as you!   Too much? ...Yep
G     C                 G
No one fights like Gaston, Douses lights like Gaston
G                  C
In a wrestling match, nobody bites like Gaston
   Am                 Dm      Dm         G       Am
When I hunt, I sneak up with my quiver And beasts of the field say a prayer
       Am                F         G#
First, I carefully aim for the liver, Then I shoot from behind
      G#             G
Is that fair? I don't care
    C                 G
No one hits like Gaston, Matches wits like Gaston
   G                 C
In a spitting match, nobody spits like Gaston
   Am            D             G#  G            C
I'm especially good at expectorating! (Spits)   Ten points for Gaston!
Am               G              D             G
When I was a lad, I ate four dozen eggs every morning to help me get large
Am                   G
And now that I'm grown, I eat five dozen eggs
     F       D      G
So I'm roughly the size of a bar…ge!
G    C               G
Who has brains like Gaston? Entertains like Gaston?
G                G#
Who can make up these endless refrains like Gaston?
    Am                  D   D
I use antlers in all of my decorating
G        G  G F G
Say it again
    D      D D C D
Who's a man among men?
     F       D       G           Am
Who's the super success? Don't you know? Can't you guess?
    F         E        Am
Ask his fans and his five hangers-on
        F       D        G       A7
There's just one guy in town, Who's got all of it down...

    Dm       G
And his name's G-A-S...T...I believe there's another T...
It just occurred to me that I'm illiterate
                                    G
And I've never actually had to spell it out loud before...

C      G C
Gaston!