Gaston

[Intro] D  A7  D  A7  D  A7

( A )

Bm                      Bm   
Gosh, it disturbs me to see you 
           Bm                     Bm
Gaston, looking so down in the dumps
Bm                       Bm      
Every guy here'd love to be you, 
         Bm                    Bm
Gaston! Even when taking your lumps
D                           D    
There's no man in town as admired
                D                  
 as you, you're everyone's favorite
 D
 guy
Bm          Bm/A      E/G#      
Everyone's awed and inspired by 
              E                    
you, and it's not very hard to see 
A
why

( B )

A       D                         
No one's slick as Gaston, No one's 
A
quick as Gaston
          A                   D
No one's neck's as incredibly thick 
as Gaston
            Bm                     
For there's no man in town half as 
Em      Em        A        D
manly perfect, a pure paragon!
        Bm                   
You can ask any Tom, Dick, or 
 G
Stanley
            Bb             Bb 
And they'll tell you whose team 
         Bb           A
they'd prefer to be on

( C )

A    A+   D                     
Who plays darts like Gaston?, 
          A
Who breaks hearts like Gaston?
            A                      
Who's much more than the sum of his
 D
 parts like Gaston?
     Bm                
As a specimen, yes, I'm 
 E
intimidating!
Bb         A         D
My, what a guy, that Gaston!

Continues after the ad
( D )

  A                     A/A#
I needed encouragement, thank you, 
LeFou
              A/B        A/C  
Well, there's no one as easy to 
   A/C#
bolster as you!   Too much? ...Yep

( E )

A  A+    D                       
No one fights like Gaston, douses 
  A
lights like Gaston
A                            D
In a wrestling match, nobody bites 
like Gaston
       Bm                      
When I hunt, I sneak up with my 
 Em         Em            A      
quiver and beasts of the field 
     Bm
say a prayer
         Bm                   
First, I carefully aim for the 
 G             Bb
liver, then I shoot from behind
        Bb                A
Is that fair? I don't care

( F )

       D                        
No one hits like Gaston, Matches 
 A
wits like Gaston
     A                       D
In a spitting match, nobody spits 
like Gaston
    Bm                
I'm especially good at 
 E                     Bb A      
expectorating! (Spits)   Ten 
         D
points for Gaston!

[Bridge]

F#                       Bm      
When I was a lad, I ate four 
              E                    
dozen eggs every morning to help me
 A
 get large
A                             Bm 
And now that I'm grown, I eat 
          Bm/A
five dozen eggs
       E/G#         E        A
So I'm roughly the size of a bar…ge!

( G )

A   A+  D               
Who has brains like Gaston? 
       A
Entertains like Gaston?
A                           
Who can make up these endless 
  Bb7
refrains like Gaston?
      D/A                 
I use antlers in all of my 
   E/G#    E
decorating

A            A A G A
Say it again
        E/G#          E E D E
Who's a man among men?
          G          E/G#          
Who's the super success? Don't you 
A                Bm
know? Can't you guess?
        G            F#7          Bm
Ask his fans and his five hangers-on
             G          E/G#      
There's just one guy in town, 
  A             B7
who's got all of it down

        Em         A
And his name's G-A-S...T...I believe
 there's another T
It just occurred to me that I'm 
illiterate
And I've never actually had to spell
                    A
 it out loud before

D           Bb  A   D
Gaston!