Mercury must be in retrograde
Nothing lately has gone my way
My light's on fire
I'm getting tired

They say that bad things come in threes
But how come it dozens when it's me?
Every day is harder
Sanity seems farther

Woke up late, lost my phone
Tried to call in, dial tone
Out of gas, tires blown
Typical, I'm alone

There goes Murphy's Law
Tell me, where did I go wrong?
Keeping calm to carry on
Lifeline's blurry in my palm
Down to my last straw
Picking at my every flaw
Wish I had a crystal ball
But I guess that's just Murphy's Law
(Guess that's just Murphy's Law)

The internet poisoned my brain
Wash my standards down the drain
Plug me in and re-wire
I'm preaching to the choir
'Cause I'm not the way I used to be
Douse my old self in gasoline
Killed my desire, that girl expired

Woke up late, lost my phone
Tried to call in, dial tone
What's the worst that could happen?
Anything you'd imagine

There goes Murphy's Law
Tell me, where did I go wrong?
Keeping calm to carry on
Lifeline's blurry in my palm
Down to my last straw
Picking at my every flaw
Wish I had a crystal ball
But I guess that's just Murphy's Law

Talking through to feel it out
Yeah, that's the only way I know how
I'm human confusion
Nothing is as soothing as thinking later, speaking now
Secrets sneak through my mouth
I know what I'm doing
I'm always picking and choosing
(What's the worst that could happen?)
(Anything you'd imagine)

There goes Murphy's Law
Tell me, where did I go wrong?
What's the worst that could happen?
Anything you'd imagine
What's the worst?
What's the worst?
What's the worst that could happen?
What's the worst?
What's the worst?
What's the worst that could happen?