C                C7
I got lucky on my birthday
          F                        C
My wife reluctantly let me have my way
                      C                     A7
She said "This is for you, do what you must do"
                        D
Let me know when you’re through

                       C                       C7
I thought things would change when we tied the knot
               F                       C
But the life I dreamed of ain’t what I got
               C               D
When she say’s no, she means no
     C  F  C   C7
Hell No!

[Chorus]
               F                                                   C      A7
I couldn’t get laid when I was single if you, threw me in a woman’s prison
  D                              G
I am the poster child for total rejection
F                                 C     C/B  A7
Celibacy is the cross that I must carry
               D
I couldn’t get laid when I was single
G                         C        F  C
So I guess I’ll just stay married

[Verse]
             C                      C7
I‘ve gotta a bulldog, he lives on a chain
                 F                      C
I know what he’s going thru, I feel his pain
                 C                 A7
He don’t have no fun on that doggy run
              D     G
He never gets none
         C                         C7
He’s got potential if he could get free
                     F              C
But he’s on a short leash just like me
                C                D
He goes through life with hungry eyes
                     C   F C  C7
Watching b***hes go by
      

[Chorus]
               F                                                   C
I couldn’t get laid when I was single if you, threw me in a woman’s prison
  A7                              D       G
I am the poster child for total rejection
F                                 C     C/B  A7
Celibacy is the cross that I must carry    oh no
               D
I couldn’t get laid when I was single
G                         C        F  C
So I guess I’ll just stay married