Their scaremongering ads on the buses and the trains,
sending threatening letters, try to make you pay,
whatever happened to innocent til proven guilty,
there's no excuse even if you never watch TV.

they keep writing - they keep warning
they come knocking - but they'll never get in
TV detector man, try all you can, you'll never get in

they use detection vans sneaking up on families,
try to catch 'em in the act of watching BBC,
it's just another stealth tax to cash feed the treasury,
cos there is never ever anything decent on TV.