Give me my toy right now!
No, this toy is my toy!
Well, it seems we're at an impasse
Yeah, we'll have to tug of war for it

It's mine!
It's mine!
No, it isn't!
Yes, it is!
I know it for a fact
'Cause I marked it with a whiz

No, you didn't!
Yes, I did!
No, you didn't 'cause I did!
Well, I did it first when I was
Playing with the kid

Well, you dug it up
So what if I did?
Well, the fact that it was buried
Implies ownership

No, it doesn't!
Yes, it does!
Well, it wasn't!
Yes, it was!
Well, in the backyard
Those aren't applicable laws

Oh, yes, they are!
Oh, no, they're not!
You're just making stuff up
'Cause you got caught

Just let it go, bro
You've lost this round
I'll call the paw-lice
You'll go to the pound

Man, what is your problem?
Why you actin' this way?
'Cause I don't like dealing
With a mangy, lying stray

Now, wait just a minute
You've gone too far
Well, tell it to the cops
When you're in the squad car

All units, we have a 10-40 in progress at Barkway Boulevard
Caller reports two huskies engaged in a heated altercation
Unit 7 en route
Any additional info on the suspects?
Caller described two males, one Caucasion, one mixed-breed
Arguing over who urinated on a toy first

It's mine!
It's mine!
No, it isn't!
Yes, it is!
I can prove to you it's not
Based on my analyses

Oh, you're nothin' but a mutt
Well, you live for sniffin' butt!
If you'll just look at the data
It'll tell you what is what

You're just making stuff up
Who are you tryin' to kid?
When you see my Power Point
You're gonna wish that I did

No, I won't
Yes, you will
You're a dolt
You're a pill
The judge ruled that it was mine
I won it back in an appeal

This toy was never yours
Yes it was, and is still
My grandpuppy left it to me
When he died, in his will

Your grandpuppy was a thief
And he stole it from mine
Well, why is yours in the kennel
Still doin' hard time?

Man, you got a lot of nerve
Talkin' 'bout him that way
Well, what do you expect
For a mangy, lying stray?

That's it, I've had it
You've gone too far
Well, tell it to the cops
'Cause they're in the front yard

You two, drop the toy, and put your paws where I can see 'em!