Am             Em              Am                   Em
I am hanging in the bathroom at the biggest party of the fall
        F                  Am             C             Am
I could stay right here or disappear, and nobody'd even notice at all

       Am          Em                Am                   Em
I'm a creeper in a bathroom 'cause my buddy kinda left me alone
        F                         Am              C                            Am
But I'd rather fake pee than stand awkwardly, or pretend to check a text on my phone

F                    Em                   C
Everything felt fine when I was half of a pair
               F              Em                     C
Now through no fault of mine, there's no other half there

[Chorus]
             F                       Am                             C
Now I'm just Michael in the bathroom, Michael in the bathroom, at a party
Am
Forget how long it's been
         F                        Am                           C
I'm just Michael in the bathroom, Michael in the bathroom at a party
Am
No you can't come in!
C                            Em
I'm waiting it out 'til it's time to leave
C                         F
And picking at grout as I softly grieve
        C                Am          C                    F
I'm just Michael who you don't know, Michael flyin' solo, Michael in the bathroom by himself
           C
Oh, by himself

[Verse]
       Am             Em              Am              Em
I am hiding, but he's out there, just ignoring all our history
         F                   Am                    C                         Am
Memories get erased, and I'll get replaced, with a newer, cooler version of me
       Am                    Em       Am                  Em     Am
And I hear a drunk girl sing along to Whitney through the door - I wanna dance with somebody!
       F                       Am                          C                     Am
And my feelings sink, 'cause it makes me think: now there's no one to make fun of drunk girls with anymore!

[Chorus]
              F              Am         C
Now it's just Michael in the bathroom, Michael in the bathroom at a party
Am
I half regret the beers
F                                       Am            C
Michael in the bathroom, Michael in the bathroom at a party
Am
As I choke back the tears
C                                     F
I'll wait as long as I need, until my face is dry
            C                               F
Or I'll just blame it on weed, or something in my eye!
         C                           Am                      
I'm just Michael who you don't know, Michael flyin' solo
C                          F
Michael in the bathroom by himself!

[Bridge]
Am      Am       Am      Am
Knock, knock, knock, knock
C
They're gonna start to shout soon
Am      Am       Am      Am
Knock, knock, knock, knock
C
Oh hell yeah, I'll be out soon

A      A      A      A
Knock, knock, knock, knock
F
It sucks you left me here alone-
A      A      A      A
Knock, knock, knock, knock
F
Here in this teenage battle zone-

E      E      E      E
Clang, clang, clang, clang
F
I feel the pressure blowing up-
E     E     E     E
Bang, bang, bang, bang
F
My big mistake was showing up-

Am       Am        Am     Am
Splash, splash, splash, splash
F                        Em *
I throw some water in my face
                     F *
And I am in a better place
                    Em *
I go to open up the door
                          F
But I can't hear knocking Anymore

            Am       Em
And I can't help but yearn
      C         Am
For a different time
           C           Am
And then I look in the mirror
        C          Am
And the present is clearer
               F        C
And there's no denying, I'm just-

[Chorus]
 F  Am  [x2]                                          

C
At a party
Am
Is there a sadder sight than-
 F  Am                                 
*hums*
F             Am             C
Michael in the bathroom at a party

[Verse]
         Am
This is a heinous night
         F                              C
I wish I stayed at home in bed watching cable porn
          Am
Or wish I offed myself instead
           C
Wish I was never born!
          Am             F
I'm just Michael who's a loner
   Am            C
So he must be a stoner
Am         F
Rides a PT Cruiser
Am              C
God he's such a loser
Am             F
Michael flyin' solo
Am                  C
Who you think that you know
Am             F           C
Michael in the bathroom by himself
C         F
Oh, by himself
C        F
Oh, by himself
C        F
All you know about me is my name
C        F
Awesome party
C      F         C
I'm so glad I came