Oh Ron
You were so glad
When you got that Krum figurine
But now
Things have changed
Or so it seems
And we wonder if it's because of Hermione
Because after the Yule Ball
I found the missing arm of Viktor Krum
Underneath my bed

Oh Ron
As a wizard we expect a little more from you
Because at Hogwarts they don't teach hokey stuff like Voodoo
You should know that dismembering figurines of your enemies
Won't help you impress Hermione
She's not interested in mutilated toys

What is it with you and her?