Uncle Bernies Farm

 C
(I'm dreaming...)

           Am
There's a bomb to blow yo mommy up,
  B           G     Am
A bomb for yo daddy too! (Ouch!)
  Am
A baby doll that burps 'n pees;
  B       G        Am
A case of airplane glue!


D
There's a hungry plastic troll,
To scarf yo buddy's arm!
There's a box of ugly plastic things
 marked:
D      F        G
"UNCLE BERNIE'S F RM"


          Am
There's a little plastic 'CONGD SS'
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           B       G       Am
There's a 'NATION' you can buy!

There's a doll that looks like mommy
           B   G        Am
(She'll do anything but cry) (Yes, 
Sir)

D
There's a doll that looks like daddy

(He's a funny little man...

Push a button 'n ask fo money:
          D      F      G
There's a dollar in his hand!) 
(Check his wallet)


              C7
We gotta send Sanny claus back to de
 Rescue Mission!

Christmas don't make it no more!
                   F         
Don'tcha know that murder an' 
 F7
destruction
F         F7
Scream de toys in every store! (I 
think this is sold in New York)


          Am
There's a man who runs the country
          B       G        Am
There's a man who tried to think
Am
And they're all made out of plastic
           B          G      
(When they melt, they start to 
  Am
stink)


          D
There's a book with smiling 
children,

Nearly dead with Christmas joys

And smiling in his office
       D         F      G
is the creep who makes 'the toys'