It's College time again
September's almost here
Hanging with freshmen girls
Frat party kegs of beer
I see a girl I'm wanting
mixer at Delta Chi
we take some oxycontin
Dave Matthew gettin' high
and then as I undress her
and start my stimulus
she says but wait professor
this wasn't on the syllabus

I'm the bad professor
I'm the bad professor
A tenured titty caresser
I'm a bad, bad man

Tutor her at my apartment
turns into a slow dance
Hey baby, what's your minor got your major in my pants
I love her student body
She wants a better grade
I say if you roll over I'll throw in financial aid

I hope you've boned up for your midterm
If you want, I can help you cram
Don't give a shit about the essay test
So let's skip it and get to the oral exam

I'm a bad professor
that's a blow job reference
I'm a bad professor
Your money's on the dresser
I'm a bad, bad man