Am                           F
Bastard son of the carnival strongman,
  Am                              E
taught to fear the white rat by his great-granddad.
  Am                         F
Still he ain't no slouch at crammin' 'em in
 Am              E      Am
with a bullhorn in his hand.

  Am                             F
Formaldehyde's half empty but he tops it off
      Am                    E7
with a bottle of burglar's wine.
Am                                      F
They beat a blind man to death with his own damn cane
      A        E         Am
on a jam-packed saturday night.
              D
Well he's the devil's understudy, you know he's always ready
Am
to fill in in a pinch.
              D7                                    D
Well he gon' try to be your buddy, or maybe be your honey
E                     F      E
baby just grab an inch.

             Am                    F
He says the grindin' wheel always gets the grease,
           Am                   E7
though the blade is bloody and dull.
            Am                      F
But you'll drum off flies with the greatest of ease
       Am     E           Am
with a bible, candle, and skull, boys.

Am     E           Am
Bible, candle and skull.
Am           E          Am
B-B-B-Bible, candle and skull, boys.
Am     E          Am
Bible, candle and skull.

 Am                    F
Equal parts floozy and flim-flam,
          Am               E
she's the ugly one in her one-woman band.
         Am                           F
She says he ain't Mr. right, but he's Mr. right now,
             Am           E          Am
yeah he's my presidential confidence man.

D
He's kissin' hands and shaking babies from Herkimer to Hades,
          Am
with his third-place trophy bride.
D
Plantin' seeds of deception like a kudzu weed
             E                               F       E
just hold it out, drop it, and run for your life!

Am                                 F
Well even a two-headed fetus outta have a good home,
Am                                   Em
not in the trunk where jumper cables belong.
Am                                          F
But that's just that kind of thing that'll set you off,
           Am     E          Am
resist his bible, candle and skull, boys.

Am      E         Am
Bible, candle and skull.
      Am      E         Am
B-B-B-Bible, candle and skull, boys.
Am     E           Am
Bible, candle and skull.

Am                                    F
Well the candle's snuffed and there's nothing left
       Am                     E
in the spotlight but bugs and bats.
            Am                  F
He took his one-drop rule complimentary mule
       Am     E           Am
and a dirt road to Arkansas,
       Am           E       Am                E Am
to his hometown of Hope at last!